Poor Choices & a Parent's Prerogative

Question: What do you do if you've raised your child in the fear and admonition of the Lord and they choose to make poor choices as a young adult?

 

Answer: There  is nothing more heart wrenching for a parent  than to see them making poor choices and feeling helpless to do anything about it. Even worse, when you come to the realization that one or more of your adult children are not serving the Lord.  I think it is most important to understand that as parents, we only need to take responsibility for our own mistakes and failures but not the mistakes and failures of our children. There will never be a perfect parent. We, in our humanity will make mistakes, and hopefully, we will learn from them. We also need to understand that it is not our responsibility to save our children. God saves, not us. Instead, we should do our best to be a godly example to them and to raise our children in the ways of the Lord. The rest is up to our children and the Holy Spirit. 

Through lots of prayer, trusting in God's Word, and encouragement from other godly parents will help us to grow in Christ and be a better parent, even if our children are already adults.  If you are able to share your heartfelt concerns with your kids, do so in love and gentleness, letting them know you are not trying to control them but just trying to be a parent to them. If your adult children are un-teachable and will not listen to your counsel, then be as gracious as you can and continue loving, being there, and above all, praying for them consistently.  The effective prayer of a righteous man (or woman) avails much, so never give up on them. Only God knows what it will take to bring them to Him, so entrust them to God daily and allow the Holy Spirit to use your kids to help you grow to become more like Christ.  (Romans 8:28-29. )

If your adult children are living at home, stick to any house rules you have set. You will not want to enable sinful behavior by making it easy for them to sin in your presence. Instead, your love for them and the love of Christ will transcend all things; your faith in God will keep you strong and give you courage as you wait on the Lord to complete His work in your child's life.